Just when I thought Mother Nature was finally done throwing seasonal surprises our way, my own mother sent the following text message.

(Please be warned…if you can’t stand snakes, don’t look) 

Of course, curiosity got the best of me and, like a human, I enlarged the image.

Blegh!!! Unreal! And look how fat that frog is. I don’t know what’s creepier, how huge that snake is or how fat that frog is.

Mom went on to tell me that the snake gave up on trying to eat the frog, which is pretty crazy if you ask me. Aren’t those guys able to detach their jaws? Maybe she was sparing my feelings (#TeamFrog).

Dad supposedly scared the snake away and now things are “safe” again at the parents’ house, but I have my reservations. That slithery bastard was just waiting right outside the front door. Eating its prey on the stoop, waiting to wrap itself around a warm, unsuspecting body and then claim a strangle hold like some kind of suburban Anaconda.

On a related note, does anyone know where I can get a Mongoose?